The Healing Practice of Forgiveness

The Healing Practice of Forgiveness

- Rev. Steven Sousa, Minister, St. Paul’s of Palmer, U.U.A. Church

Forgiveness is one of the most profound and transformative practices in our lives. It has the power to mend relationships, restore trust, and break the cycles of resentment that keep us distant from one another. When we choose forgiveness, we create space for healing—not just for those we forgive, but for ourselves as well.

The Burden of Unforgiveness

Carrying resentment is like carrying a heavy weight upon the heart. When we hold onto grudges, they isolate us, building walls where there should be bridges. Unforgiveness festers, corroding our ability to trust, to love, and to grow in our relationships. The pain of past wounds can keep us stuck, preventing us from fully embracing the present and moving forward in grace.

The Restorative Power of Forgiveness

Forgiveness does not erase the past, but it releases us from its grip. It allows us to mend broken bonds and bring joy back into our relationships. One of the most powerful illustrations of this is found in the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15). The father’s embrace of his wayward son is a perfect image of the radical, healing love that true forgiveness offers. No questions, no punishment—only open arms and a restored relationship.

A Path to Healing: Three Steps Toward Forgiveness

While forgiveness is a deeply personal journey, there are steps we can take to cultivate it in our lives:

1. Name the hurt – We cannot heal what we refuse to acknowledge. Naming our pain honestly allows us to understand its impact and begin the process of moving forward.

2. Release the desire for retaliation – The impulse to seek revenge or dwell in resentment only deepens our wounds. Choosing to let go is not about excusing harm, but about freeing ourselves from its hold.

3. Open yourself to healing – True forgiveness creates space for reconciliation and renewed connection. Even when relationships cannot be restored, forgiving allows us to live with greater peace and compassion.

   
   

Choosing Love Over Resentment

Forgiveness is not about forgetting or minimizing pain. Rather, it is about choosing love over resentment, grace over bitterness. It is about recognizing that holding onto anger serves only to bind us, while letting go sets us free. As we walk this path of forgiveness, may we find deeper, healthier relationships and a heart unburdened by past hurts.

There is a place for you here. If you are seeking a community where healing and grace are embraced, join us at St. Paul’s of Palmer. Together, we can journey toward forgiveness, love, and renewal.

We invite you to worship with us on Sunday mornings at 10 am. If you are in need of pastoral counsel, Rev. Sousa is available to offer support. With a warm and empathetic personality, he is widely known for being an effective pastoral counselor. According to Sousa, “My heart and most sincere desire is to bring a sense of peace and wholeness to individuals and their families, especially to those on the margins of our communities.”